Islands

I have been doing the work of finding islands of peace pretty steadily for about six days now.* It’s going swimmingly — and by that I mean that I am usually far from shore. But my use of the word is not entirely sardonic; it’s going as well as can be expected; I can now keep in mind almost all the time that such islands exist, and I can find them on my own. I have never had to do this before: a text to my best friend (no need for response) was the fastest way to an island and, by mutual agreement, I used that method of transportation more often than any other. For some reason I didn’t have the same trouble then that I am having now, which is that staying on an island of acceptance is very difficult work. Well, I will have lots of practice! I am feeling pretty good just now and my “hooray” is not at all facetious.

*This is the work I have been doing for years, but this fall I took a break from it. I’m starting again by dint of circumstance.

The work of finding balance of expression is not going as well! You can see by the paragraph above that I am currently in the mood for indiscretion. And even in real life I am frequently snarkier than I intend, which is grossly unfair, as the range of snark I can stand from Wafflets is extremely limited. I’ll figure that out, though.

I remember feeling unsure last week about the work that I need to do right now — whether I should cut and run to go back to farm work, or just go be a Catholic Worker already or what. But I am doing considerable work, in three parts. First and foremost, my work is to love my students, keep them safe, and teach them to love others and themselves. Second, I am still, in a limited way, practicing my food-production and homemaking skills. And third, I am learning how to love freely, independently, and fully, without tearing myself apart. (I cannot yet love politely. Sorry, Wafflets. That’s work for later. I am trying not to be too hurtful, or thoughtless, or actively rude, but it’s a lot.) The work I’m doing now feels like work worth doing.

In other news: most of the remaining tomato seedlings do appear likely to Make It at least until it’s time to plant them out (I literally just knocked on our coffee table, just in case). The mushroom table looks positively Pinterest-worthy. The compost bin is still not done but I bought the drill bits I needed and theoretically I can do it whenever it quits raining. I cooked dinner maybe once this week so I’m looking forward to more cooking next week.

The lilac is blooming, the bleeding hearts are glorious, and I finally got all the way through the process of harvesting and processing knotweed shoots (it’s not even that long, but the season’s so short!) to taste the spectacularly mediocre sweet puree recommended by City Herbal. (Maybe next year I’ll try a different recipe.) The garlic mustard is flowering already. So is our neighbor’s Giant Solomon’s Seal, a personal favorite of mine. (I mean to look at. It’s edible, but not responsible to eat.) I found a patch of nettle last week and though not terribly convenient it’s certainly in a place I can return to, so this week or next the Waffle will be enjoying nettle quiche. Or something. There’s very little that nettle isn’t good in.

I wonder if the milkweed is sprouting? The pokeweed almost certainly is, but I haven’t seen any skeletons whatsoever, and I don’t imagine I’ll find any until late summer when it’s much more visible. Well, if I’m here next May I’ll know where to find them. (I see why I used to speak with such certainty; I see why I bought the loom. It would be so lovely to think about next May and know I’d be here. Maybe it’s enough to enjoy this May. I’m doing my best.)

Romp!

I went to Oberlin this weekend! I took Greyhound and it was terrible. I like buses. I even like late buses. I don’t like buses that are so late that I miss my connections and need to be rescued at one in the morning. But I was rescued — three times: once at 1 AM, from Greyhound’s clutches; once on Sunday morning from my own poor planning; and once on Sunday night from the driving rain. All in all I was very grateful for my strong support system. Sarah especially came through for me, once at 1 AM, once by loaning her valuable car, and I also very much appreciated Noah and Jayme’s time.

Anyway, to the fun stuff! I must confess, dear readers, that this post is mostly of interest only to me. I will be happy in several years to be reminded of my day at Romp and think fondly of the friends I saw, some of whom are familiar to some of you. A brief temporal orientation: I left Friday noon for the Greyhound to Oberlin, and spent Saturday in town, nominally to attend the Dandelion Romp (a contra festival), but in reality to see the friends who were attending the Dandelion Romp, and also to dance a little. I left at ten AM Sunday morning to catch my bus back here.

I am using real names for everybody because I don’t think I’m saying anything that shouldn’t be public, but if you are in this and would rather not be, let me know and I will erase the sentence or your name, whichever!

Anyway, on Saturday at 1, I arrived at Eleanor’s house, and in the morning I took a quick trip to the Arb to see the trout lilies, and stopped by the knotweed patch to gather some shoots — the first I have ever gathered in many years of wanting to! They are like rhubarb and I plan to make a tiny batch of jelly. I arranged at nine to run an errand for a friend at ten and so I had to dash out of the house just as Eleanor’s first chocolate-chip pancake was ready. I spent the next two hours at workshops, intermittently dancing — my first dance was with Elizabeth, an ECO friend! what a treat — and talking. I was greeted at 10:02 by a riotous hug from Noah, after which we went to our respective workshops. The break between workshops found me with Ari in the sun, chewin’ grass, just catching up. (Some of you know how much this would have meant to me.) And I saw Ida, and we hugged with tremendous momentum! After several challenging contras (the focus of the second workshop) Noah and I skipped out on one that we were too tired to understand and chatted a little, enjoying the music.

I went home (that is, to Eleanor’s house) to lunch and take a long walk with Eleanor, which was lovely, then had tea with Ari, which was also lovely, and popped in to talk to Mary Hammond, whose ankle is healing! (That was lovely too.) Then I had a truly beautiful walk with Ida in the Arb and was invited back to Ma’ayan’s house for a delicious* dinner with Ida, Noah, Ma’ayan (of course) and Ma’ayan’s (lovely) friends, Sneha and Jess, during which we entertained strangers and chatted amongst ourselves. I was due back at Eleanor’s for dinner number two but I took a moment and went with everyone to find Will and tackle/hug him and spend a few moments enjoying their company. Dinner number two was very nice, and afterwards Eleanor and I walked together to the Saturday night dance, just to dance once or twice at least. We danced maybe half a dozen times! what a pleasure! After walking Eleanor home I rode back to the dance just in time for the final number and found a partner who I had had to refuse while leaving and was very happy, despite my blistered feet. There were two parties afterwards, an exclusive and a nonexclusive, and I happily went to the nonexclusive to sing drinking songs with Harris, Dave, Zoe and assorted other worthies. I went home around two, very happy with the entire day, and disappointed only that I hadn’t gotten to see more of Noah.

But! Noah texted me after leaving the other party and we had a long walk and a very short sleepover and in the morning I “helped” Noah and Eli cook breakfast for the contra bands and callers. After a brief panic about the impossibility of getting to Cleveland in time for my bus and an attempt to change my return ticket to Monday (can’t be done, except at a terminal, for reasons that escape me), I told Sarah it was, in fact, “the absolute worst case scenario” (the condition under which she had agreed to lend her car to us) and Noah drove me to the airport and I took the train into the city. I bought chocolate for everybody and wrote some internal IOUs. I think it’ll come even in the end.

I wasn’t planning to go for Commencement, because my one day of Romp was so perfect, and my two days of Greyhound travel were so awful, that I didn’t feel the need to return soon. But Michelle Obama is officially speaking at our Commencement, and not everyone will be there, but plenty of people will. Stay tuned …

*of course — Ma’ayan cooked!